So you want to be a politician? It helps if you are a Malay!

Selamat Pagi Malaysia....

If any of you out there want to be a politician, I just want to say this....being a Malay helps. Most of the votes out there are with the Malays to give to anyone they want to give it to. For sure, there are Malays who will give their votes to a non-Malay, but here is the truth...if you want to do government, the Malay votes are needed. The normal way to get Malay votes is to be....a Malay, of course! Some people do get away with getting the Malay votes by being "almost" a Malay, but I do not want to be sued for labeling anyone as being "almost a Malay". Especially not this guy!

Chinese politicians are finding it hard to get Chinese voters to vote for them. Do you see a Chinese telling another Chinese that if they do not vote for a Chinese, they will not get to go to heaven and have those 72 virgins? The Chinese already know that they do not have to die to get virgins or go to heaven. They have it all now, on this earth. No need to die ma! So no Chinese is going to vote for another Chinese if they hears their potential YB promising them these things. That potential YB better be able to deliver what he has promised....and that is harder to do than to promise them 72 virgins and going to heaven. Kan?

But a Malay....you tell a Malay that he has to die first because there is a better alternative waiting for him on the other side, most Malays will believe you! The Malay will be lining up to die to be sure of going to heaven and getting those 72 virgins! And the Malay, who is still unsure that he will go to heaven if or when he dies, takes the sure way of going to heaven. They vote for PAS!

As for that promise of those 72 virgins....look around you and see how many Malays would ever have any chance of getting any good sex with anybody! The Malays cannot even be in proximity to anyone who is not their wife! And you and I know where you can get good sex kan? That problem does not exist for the Chinese or the Indians.....they can be in proximity with anyone they like and Jakim will look the other way. Pity the Malays!

What do you think an Indian will do if another Indian tells him to vote for an Indian or else the "others" will take whatever jobs, land, and self-respect they still have? Hell, they will never believe that Indian because they know that they are already being marginalized. They have nothing more to lose even if they vote for the others!

But a Malay will not want to lose so many things......being prime minister or menteri besars, losing their ketuanan Melayu, being able to park anywhere when they go to Friday prayers, getting discounts to buy houses, getting a decent education even if they do not have good grades, getting APS, the list is endless. Just telling a Malay that he might lose these privileges will get you the Malay votes. The Indians don't care because they have already lost everything - so they know voting for an Indian, any Indian, is not going to help their cause.

Seriously...can you think of anyone else who really wants to be a politician other than a Malay?

The Chinese and Indians do not want to be cursed and be branded as liars, scammers, and corrupt by everyone, but the Malays are okay with it.

Look at how many Malay politicians are being called corrupt and greedy - and some are already in jail for being corrupt. No problems for these Malays because they don't mind what others think of them as long as they have many millions in the bank. Who cares what people think of you, as long as they call you Datuk, Tan Sri...or even a Tun! You will still get respect kan?

So just a reminder....if you want to be a politician...being a Malay is a good start. Just ask this guy!

Enough said.